After the post on What it takes, I proceeded to ask few unmarried men their views or convictions on what it takes for a man to make a woman his wife as promised in the post. The views expressed here were either typed and sent to me via social media or recorded and sent to me to be translated into writing. These are views of unmarried christian men and it is posted here with their full permission and awareness.
“Almost every person is influenced by Society and their environment both man and woman… let me use myself as example, before I came to know the Lord, my ideal wife was;
1) A gorgeous woman that will sexually satisfy me
2). A woman that my friends and family will approve off. But now that I’m a Christian my ideal wife is a woman who seeks to be like Jesus day in and day out just like I do in spite of outward appearance and what friends and family thinks. And I have come to this conclusion because of the teachings of the bible”.
“First and foremost, I’d want the LORD’S blessing. The second thing is the endorsement of leaders, parents and family; people who I allow to speak into my life. I wouldn’t like to run into this decision because of passion, but would rather exercise patience and allow the LORD to direct me.
I believe this can be likened to a father wanting good wife for his son;he presents her to him and ask him about her.In the same way, God will present her to me and say son; what do you think? Hence, as Paul said in 2 Corinthians 5: 16; about knowing or evaluating people not according to the flesh but the Spirit, I’d like to know her in the Spirit.
I also believe a man should pursue and initiate love and then a woman responds to the love initiation or pursuance. Another thing is, the focus should not be on similarity or difference. Rather, someone that I can run the same race with. I want her to be bone of my bone and flesh of my flesh.
In summary, the biggest thing to me is the move of God. I”ll pursue only if God wants me to; like Moses; am not moving if God is not coming with me”.
“Major thing for me will be clearance from the LORD. This is something, I have witnessed in the life of others; a clearance from the LORD in terms of confirmations. I would seek confirmation from the LORD by putting several fleeces before the LORD with specific requests for confirmation. Added to this, I will talk with the leaders in my life and ask for approval.
Finally, the peace from the LORD will be icing on the cake to reassure and confirm that the woman or marriage is God’s will for my life”.
Yes, I know the underlying theme is biased; revolving around God and JESUS Christ. What were you expecting? A christian’s allegiance and loyalty is to the master and savior and LORD JESUS and rightly so, his influence and guidance in all aspects of life. Let me ask you, If you had a very important exam to take and you were informed of someone who had the manual to help prep you to pass the exam, would you not seek him out? Yep, you would! Why then will anyone bypass the God who created man and life to able to “pass” and live life in abundance?
He quoted a proverb: “‘Can a blind man guide a blind man?’ Wouldn’t they both end up in the ditch? An apprentice doesn’t lecture the master. The point is to be careful who you follow as your teacher. (Luke 6:39-40)